Did you follow all that?  Let me fill in the blanks for you.  The shitty utility guy is Aaron Miles, and the great hitter from the minors is Jake Fox.  I mean based on that story, the logical thing to do when Miles comes back is to send down Andres Blanco or Bobby Scales, or maybe let Miles go altogether (or send him down, I’m not sure if they can do that though).  Right?  Right? Nope.

After [Tuesday's] game, Jake Fox was optioned to Triple-A Iowa to make room for infielder Aaron Miles.

Coming from the team that kept Hoffpauir in the minors for about 3 years too long, and still keeps him on the bench far more than he should be, this should come as no surprise.  Unfortunately the Cubs can ill-afford to play these games giving at-bats to seasoned veterans that can’t hit a grapefruit off a tee as opposed to young players that continue to tear the cover off the ball (see: Koyie Hill, Jake Fox, Micah Hoffpauir).

Of course none of this would matter if $39 million dollars (Lee, Bradley, and Soriano) would just start hitting.  Until then, get Fox, Hoffpauir and Hill in the goddamn lineup.

• Where are Hoffpauir and Koyie Hill?  They got the start last night and it paid off, but Lou needs to go with the hot (or even lukewarm) bat at this point.  I know Soto and Lee are team leaders, but if they aren’t hitting and the team isn’t scoring runs, its time to make a change.
• Hey Milton Bradley: Shut up.  I’m not saying you’re wrong, in fact you are totally right.  Everyone knows the umps are calling a bigger strike zone for you.  They do it because they don’t like you.  You know what won’t make them like you?  Publicly bitching about the strike zone they are calling for you.
• Is it really time to hit the panic button?  Because if it is, the Cubs should consider two guys that are raking down in the minors.  Jake Fox and Josh Vitters are crushing the ball down on the farm, so why not bring one or both of them up?  I know that would mean we would have to send someone down, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
• If you didn’t see the Harden DL thing coming, you are blind or retarded.
• Someone take Neal Cotts out behind a shed and put a bullet in him.  That guy is just terrible.  I don’t care if we don’t have any lefties, I’m sure there are righties in the pen with better ERAs against lefties than Cotts.  Well I’m not completely sure, but Cotts sucks.  Send his ass down.  I wish we had another starter so we could move Marshall to the bullpen.  Jake Peavy anyone?
• Ok this is a little out there, but did anyone consider moving Soriano to 2nd base and giving Reed Johnson and Micah Hoffpauir some more ABs in the outfield?  I know Fonzy is sub-par defensively, but runs are hard to come by these days.
• Lou Piniella is a great manager.  I mean I love the guy.  I don’t agree with every decision he makes, but he is usually good at managing and motivating his players and he seems to have a pretty good understanding of the game.  That being said, this recent quote from him has got to be a joke:

Modern technology is a wonderful thing for 21st Century baseball managers, who have computerized scouting reports and stats at their fingertips at all times. But sometimes older is better, and after watching his players go back to the video room one too many times to replay poor at-bats, manager Lou Piniella is ready to put his foot down.

“We’ve talked about closing down the video [room],” Piniella said. “But what happens invariably is the pitching coach will go down there from time to time, and so will the hitting coach.

“But if we have to, we’ll close it down for the players, at least during the game. Visualization is a great tool. But at the same time, boy, visualize good things. Don’t keep putting bad pictures in your mind.”

That sort of has a Dusty Baker ring to it, doesn’t it?

• This isn’t really related to the Cubs play on the field, but have you seen the new hats the Cubs are selling?  I think these goofy hats have gone a bit too far.  Apparently it is called the “Watermelon Smoothie“.  I mean the baseball gods cannot be happy about this kind of thing, can they?
• If you would have told me Kosuke Fukudome would be the only Cub hitting over .300 on May 27, I would have laughed and asked you if you drank the acid-laced punch.  Well here we are, and lost in all this horrible horrible shitty 8-game losing streak has been Kosuke’s resurgence this season.  His home run last night wasn’t bad either.
• Is Aramis Ramirez the glue in this Cubs lineup?  I mean ever since he went down it’s like no one can seem to hit.  I’m not sure what his clubhouse presence is like, but just having him in the lineup seems to make the other players around him better.  Hurry back Rammy!

Anyways, Lou decided that the blown save wasn’t Gregg’s fault at all.  In fact, he blamed it entirely on Koyie Hill for calling the wrong pitches behind the plate:

“You can’t walk as many people as we did from the seventh inning on. You just can’t do it. You’re going to lose,” said Piniella, who was most upset about the Duffy walk — for the pitch selection as much as the result. ”Get the ball over the plate. Make the other team beat you. Period.”

Piniella called Hill into his office after the game to make the point clear enough to be heard out in the clubhouse: Don’t fool around with secondary pitches there; make Duffy hit a fastball.

Wow, so this was so much Koyie’s fault that Lou felt the need to embarass him publicly by yelling at him so everyone in the clubhouse could hear?  Here’s my theory:  Lou made a controversial decision to make Gregg the closer over Marmol.  Now that it is starting to blow up in his face, he is trying to blame it on other people and defend his decision to make Gregg the closer.

On the other hand, maybe he is just trying to manage egos, and he doesn’t want Gregg’s fragile ego to be damaged.  That way he still has confidence when Lou sends him to the mound.  Either way, the Kevin Gregg experiment is off to a shaky start, and I think it’s getting close to Marmol time.

Also, Koyie Hill, who is a very good catcher defensively and can even hit, has won the battle for back up catcher.  He beat out Crappy McCrap (Paul Bako), who was given a second chance with the Cubs.  He hit .231 this spring going into his 4-4 performance last week against Oakland.  Good riddance Paulie!

Here is the official press release from the Cubbies:

MESA, Ariz. — Koyie Hill and Micah Hoffpauir have both made the Cubs’ Opening Day roster. Paul Bako and Mike Stanton are looking for jobs.

The Cubs announced Monday they have released Bako and Stanton. The moves trim the spring roster to 28, which includes 15 pitchers, two catchers, six infielders and five outfielders.

Hill has been battling back from a chainsaw injury two seasons ago that cost him 3 fingers (don’t worry, they were re-attached).  He is finally going to get a legit shot to stick on this Cubs roster and he has earned it by hitting well at AAA last season and again in camp this spring.