• Whoa!  Shaq to Cleveland could change the face of the East, or not.  It will still be fun.  Here’s a good look at all the roles that will have to be shifted on the Cavs for this trade to work out in Cleveland. [BDL]
• Hilarious fake tweets from athlete’s twitter accounts. [Luol's Dong]
• Jeff Jordan, MJ’s son, will be hanging up his shorts and focusing on his studies.  Good for him, bad for the Illini, who were hoping to develop him into a poor man’s Chester Frazier. [Tribune]
• A video from Facebook of Derrick Rose working out in California.  He looks like he’s in good shape. [Docksquad]
• Ozzie got tossed during last night’s Sox game.  I don’t know if the theatrics are going to work, Ozzie.  Kenny will have to make some moves to keep this team from sinking into the AL cellar. Not bad for a rebuilding year though.[Sun-Times]
• Eddy Curry has rededicated himself to working out.  Yeah right. [Pippen Ain't Easy]
• Aramis Ramirez is supposed to take batting practice tomorrow.  Finally.  We could be getting closer to his return. [Bleacher Nation]
• Mike Brown signs with the Chiefs. [ChiefsBlog]
• Remember they were going to make a movie about Moneyball?  Well it got scrapped, but here’s some excerpts from the script that look terrible. [Deadspin]
• Reed Johnson goes on the 15-day DL.  Ryan Freel comes off it.  The offense gets a little bit worse. [Sun-Times]

I don’t really know how to preface this little post, or even how to summarize it, because you need to read the whole thing to really appreciate it.  Basically the guys who wrote this over at Posting and Toasting are huge Knicks fans (which explains why they give a shit about Eddy Curry’s live webcam show I guess).  Sorry it’s a bit lengthy, but enjoy the weirdness:

Let me see if I can explain what just happened. I’ll try and do it chronologically.

June 17, 2009- A little after 10 p.m.: Followers of Eddy Curry’s twitter page were treated to this post:

“Broadcasting live now! See me at http://www.ustream.tv/channel/the-eddy-curry-show”.

Those who clicked quickly enough managed to catch Eddy setting up a camera, then immediately departing. Those of us who arrived a little later saw only a shot of a wall with a small, framed abstract painting on it.

Probably confused at the live stream of an empty room, the vast majority of the nearly 100 people left the video feed. Curry soon explained his disappearance with the following:

“To everybody that’s on ustream. We went to see hangover. We will be back on in 2 hrs”.

I still don’t understand why Eddy chose to catch a movie (one that he’d already seen, as you’ll know if you’re a regular reader of his page) immediately after going through the trouble to organize streaming video. Nor can I explain his decision to leave the camera live while he and his friends were gone. A few of us assembled at P&T and began commenting on this bizarre turn of events, leaving the video feed of nothing up in the background. Only it wasn’t nothing.

No, instead, viewers of the so-called “Eddy Curry Show” were treated to the most irregular, terrifying violin sounds known to man. The intermittent noises eventually grew into a series of full-fledged rock concerts by absolutely horrendous bands, complete with occasional ear-splitting sound checks. The audio went bonkers while the picture remained pretty much still. Baffled, I sent a tweet Eddy’s way:

If you’re at The Hangover, then who’s that creepy silhouette playing a creepy keyboard in your house!!??

(I originally thought that someone was playing a keyboard. Also, the shadow on the wall looked eerily like a human figure.) Not long after, Eddy responded to me, presumably from his seat in the movie theater:

yo. Nate said the same thing. I hope its the tv. Lol

The three of us commenting along at P&T (myself, Barnesgasm, and jayvb) thought no such thing, though.  We were getting stir crazy. The music was coming from that picture on the wall, we thought. The thread on the topic is essentially a joint diary of our descent into utter madness. Some comments:

“i’m really glad that there’s other people commenting along with me, because otherwise i’d be convinced i had just smoked some sort of boring, yet highly hallucinogenic drug”- Barnesgasm

“i think the picture is a picture of a guitar. i can see the strings, and there’s a hand like object over the fretboard.
prepare for another sentence that will never be said, thought, or typed again
i think the music is coming out of that haunted picture of something that looks like a guitar on eddy curry’s wall”- Barnesgasm

“well im terrified. and really confused. noone is going to believe me tomorrow.”- jaybv

At this point, only a dozen people or so were watching the webcam. I sincerely wish they could’ve joined our little support group, because we were in bad shape. Thankfully, around two hours after he initiated this horror house of an evening, Curry tweeted that he was “headed home”. Sure enough, a few minutes later, Curry and some bros, one of whom was J.R. Smith, entered the room. For the next hour, we were treated to the following:

- Curry, Smith and friends reciting and cracking up about lines from The Hangover.

- Curry realizing that some other window with streaming video had popped up in his absence, which explained the spotty, maddening music playing over the feed. We all secretly knew it was coming from his computer all along, but things get crazy when you’ve been staring at the same wall with a picture on it for two hours.

- Smith being repeatedly licked and bitten by Curry’s pet bulldog.

- Curry’s phone running out of battery.

- Curry and Smith reacting to nasty comments and racy pictures sent by viewers (now up to over 100 at times) of the stream.

- Smith playing 20 second clips of a number of songs on his laptop, except for the the New Boyz’ “You’re a Jerk”, which he played for about 10 minutes straight.

Why doesn’t it surprise me that Curry hangs out with J.R. Smith? And if Curry’s house is haunted by anything, its the ghost of his missing heart, although I guess its hard for something to be “missing” if it never existed in the first place. Boom, roasted.

• The Illini lost.  Bad.  The final score didn’t tell the story about how bad they looked. [ESPN]
• Some interesting statistics about certain Bulls players that you might not have known. [Pippen Ain't Easy]
• Lou Piniella names Marshall the 5th starter.  No surprise there. [Tribune]
• Does TrueHoop suck?  Well whether you think so or not, Henry Abbott is addressing the concerns. [TrueHoop]
• Peter Gammons thinks the Cubs are building a superpower. [ESPN]
• Eddy Curry gets custody of his 3-year old kid.  Weird, he was denying the kid was even his just a couple months ago. [Sun-Times]
• The Cubs are retiring Maddux and Jenkins numbers, but are we forgetting about one of the Cubs all-time greats?  Sammy Sosa! [Wrigleyville23]