About those Olympics. Sidney Crosby, hero to hosers everywhere, returned to the Pittsburgh Penguins for his first game after his golden goal. The captain received a nice reception (though riddled with a few good natured boos), but the Penguins’ opponent wasn’t the best draw for Sidney to get the heroes’ welcome. The Buffalo Sabres were in town and though he sat out, American goaltender Ryan Miller received the loudest ovation following his MVP performance in Vancouver. Good stuff, Pittsburgh.  As if getting upstaged wasn’t enough, Crosby is looking for some of his gear that he shed during the celebration. If you stole it I suggest trying to buy a replica stick–as if you killed his pet in a 90’s TV show–and keep the real deal for your basement bar. Oh, and you can check out other great Crosby-shops here.

Maryland beats Duke, fans get excited. In a night where all seemed right in the world, Maryland upset Duke in thrilling fashion. It was senior night in College Park and the Terps sent Grevis Vasquez out with a win over the Blue Devils. After the win Maryland fans stormed the court… by the way, there was a whistle with 0.4 seconds left in the game when it looked like the game would be over and the students showed amazing restraint in a situation that was sure to create a preemptive storming. Commendable. The rioting after? Not so much. Here’s an idea though: next time Maryland beats Duke, they should travel to Durham and riot there. Standing around on your own streets is getting old. Right Sparty?

Spring Training kicks off. I think pretty much every team has played some kind of exhibition game at this point. The favorites to win it all based on what I’ve seen? The Blue Jays, hands down.  There has already been a point of interest, though. In a Giants-Brewers game, Barry Zito plunked Prince Fielder in retaliation for a celebration by Fielder last year late in the season. The Giants and Zito have long memories, which makes you think Zito would remember how to get an out or two. Hey-o!

Let the Delhomme sweepstakes begin!NFL free agency is in full swing with a handful of moves already. The Lions signed Nate Burleson, the Bears offered anyone and everyone a contract, and there was even a trade sending Antonio Cromartie to the Jets. The names to watch before the draft are headlined by Julius Peppers and a bunch of running backs.  What this really means is just a chance for some mock drafts to take another stab, speaking of which, Ray Lewis is not available.

Chick basketball. Not sure if you noticed, but UConn’s womens basketball team is something else. Their win on Monday marked the 69th straight win for the Huskies and finished out their regular season at 30-0. Their closest game all year was a 12 point win against Stanford, handing #2 Stanford its only loss of the season. UConn is one win away from tying the womens record for consecutive wins and looks to have a good shot at UCLA’s record of 88 straight wins set by John Wooden’s squads.  There are so many stats to quote about their domination, I would just suggest going to look at their schedule and results.

U-S-A! U-S-A!  The Americans fielded (iced?) a team made up mostly of players 26 and younger, very few of which had seen action in the Olympics. The results so far couldn’t be better. Team USA is unbeaten in the tournament and plays Finland in the semifinals today at 2 CT.  Of course things got real when the Americans beat the host nation last weekend; the first time we had beaten Canada in 50 years. If we take down a tough Finland squad today, it will likely set up a rematch of USA-Canada for the gold medal. 

Take my running back, please.  Think back to three years ago and how much drool would be spilled over this running back free agent class. Tomlinson, Westbrook, Larry Johnson, and Thomas Jones will be available this off-season.  Seriously, if you told me three years ago they would all be available and they should all be approached with caution, I’d have gone all Brian Fellows on you. Anyway, a couple teams looking for a solid veteran back is going to be pretty happy. 

Don’t talk about ESPN’s lady like that. Tony Kornheiser made fun of Hannah Storm a little bit this week and ESPN was real pissed. Storm’s attire has drawn some attention before and Kornheiser really just said what a lot of people were thinking  anyway. Of course, there is no big problem with how Storm dresses, it’s just ridiculous. What’s up with the two week suspension? It started at three days and was extended to a week. Message sent ESPN, no criticizing co-workers. So Tony, next time you think about poking fun at Steve Levy’s suit, check yourself.

Durant’s amazing streak ends.  Without enough people knowing it, Kevin Durant is having an unreal season for the OKC Thunder. This week he ended a streak of 29 games scoring 25 or more points. Only Jordan put together a longer streak when he went for 40 straight games in the late 80’s. The Spurs put it to an end holding him to 21 points and shutting out the star in the fourth quarter. During the streak Durant averaged 32 ppg and shot 50% from three. Kid deserves some MVP votes.

Thank you Twitter.  There are so many ways to be heard today, which is great when you have someone as interesting as Ozzie Guillen. The Sox manager opened his Twitter account this week and the Internet may not be able to contain the awesome. Nothing earth-shattering has been tweeted thus far, but early on my favorite part is the broken English. I really hope he uses this thing to its full potential because honestly one problem with Ozzie is that I can’t understand a lot of what he’s saying at times.  Twitter should really allow him to bring the crazy in HD, but still keep that adorable habit of butchering the language.  For example, “Bed and bath I love this places,” or “going to eat in half hour why dye no have a job?”  These are the things we must know! Love it.

Tiger Woods y’all. As this post goes up Tiger will be giving his statement to the media from Florida regarding his future and certainly the past few months. I love how the media is so offended and outraged that Woods is controlling the situation. No questions?!! Well, I never! Settle down journos, I think you got your fill of TMZ-ish dirt on Tiger from his harem. Tiger owes you nothing-whether you’re a journalist, a sponsor, or fan-and if he wants to give a statement regarding his future that’s his call and you have no place to dictate or bitch about how it goes down. Now, make it up to me by yelling “you the man Tiger!” when he walks in the room. Thanks.

Olympics opening week.  Personally I have loved the first week of the Olympics more than I predicted. There have been some very compelling and exciting events like Apollo Ohno skating to a medal in short track. Short track speed skating is phenomenal. A small group of skaters fly around this tiny track and pass each other a bunch of times in the last few laps. It’s like a watchable version of NASCAR; there are even crashes! Anyway, America’s biggest stars all found their way to the medal stand this week with Shani Davis (from Chicago!), Shaun White, and Lindsey Vonn taking goldwhile Bode Miller and Apollo Ohno have also medaled.  The US even took gold in men’s figure skating last night as another Chicagoan, Evan Lysacek, became the first American man to win the event since 1988. U-S-A, U-S-A!

NBC fail, but not really.  There has been fury from fans regarding NBC’s Olympic coverage and for good reason. Dick Ebersol and the rest of the folks at the peacock have created an event that is tough to stomach for sports fans. Despite the games being conveniently located in Canada, Americans have been forced to watch many events on tape delay. There have also been a ton of commercials. I like to complain how the NFL broadcasts have the annoying policy of going to commercial after a score, then back for the kickoff, then back to commercial before the ensuing drive. NBC has taken this to another level of torturous viewing hell. During tape delayed skiing runs, they went to break after almost every three minute run, we missed large parts of hockey games while they covered post-game for curling, and there have been times where the advertising has seeped into coverage infomercial style. Despite all of this, ratings have been huge, once again showing that the bottom line is more important than pleasing your audience.

Trades!  The trade deadline in the least competitive league in professional sports passed yesterday. Of the four (two?) teams that could plausibly win the championship this year, the Cavs were the only one to make a big deal, acquiring Antwan Jamison from the Wizards for pretty much nothing. The Bulls made some moves to clear cap space next year, which seemed to be the goal of a lot of teams at the deadline. That is sad. Can the Lakers and Cavs just go ahead and play the finals now? If the NBA promises everyone a few million in cap space, everyone might agree to it.

Pitchers and catchers report. Almost every team in Major League Baseball has kicked off spring training! About a month and a half out from Opening Day, pitchers and catchers reporting is the first sign of hope that winter is coming to an end. It’s time to get your fantasy preview publication of choice and crafting your squad.

Good for them.  The Saints and Colts continued the trend of playing exciting, close Super Bowl games when they squared off in front of the largest television audience ever.  Take that, American Idol.  Obviously the game has been fawned over a ton, but obviously I have to mention the two most memorable plays in the brilliant onside kick and the pick-six by Porter.  People were arguing which play was bigger, but I don’t see how anyone can win that argument; I’m not sure the Saints would have won without both plays.  It was an awesome run for New Orleans.  The Saints beat three Hall of Fame quarterbacks on their way to their rings and Porter picked off two of them in dramatic situations.  But now what?

The Olympics.  I love the Olympics, but it seems like an event a lot of people like to complain about.  How do you complain about this? It’s three weeks of bonus sports programming!  Don’t like the Olympics? Keep watching the same crap you have been watching, since it isn’t affected unless you like hockey; and if you like hockey and don’t like Olympic hockey you can eat a cactus, because you are an awful person.  Get into the Olympics! Watch some luge until it occurs to you that you would certainly poo yourself around the second turn, watch that James Bond stuff where they ski and shoot rifles, and for the love of all that is holy watch curling.  By the time the Olympics are done, you’ll be very close to conference tournaments and it will feel like the Super Bowl hangover didn’t even happen.

College Basketball.  I’ve never really jumped into college basketball season with both feet before March, but it isn’t a bad idea at all.  Watch some teams you think have a shot at the final four and get some scouting done for that bracket you’ll fill out.  See how they play on the road against quality opponents.  Can they shoot free throws?  Do they have good enough guards who know when to attack and when to settle things down?  Are they Pittsburgh? If so, forget about it.  Syracuse and Villanova play, Kentucky plays Tennessee twice, and the Big Ten race looks like it will come down to the last week.

NBA.  This definitely won’t be my choice, but if you’re an NBA fan you’ll obviously hope LeBron and Kobe get you through this troubling time for sports fans.  If you once liked the NBA, but cooled during this era of games that should just start with eight minutes to go, maybe it’s time to come back.  If nothing else, the TNT studio show is awesome. 

NASCAR.  Just kidding, don’t watch NASCAR under any circumstances.  Read up on NFL mock drafts instead.  The big day is only a couple of months off!

Shhhhhh, the commercials are on!  Well, it’s Super Bowl weekend and the hype has been surprisingly tempered leading up to this great match-up.  I don’t know if it’s because I’m blessed with the NFL Network now and am thereby spared of Berman, % Co., but it has been pure bliss.  As for the game, it certainly has the chance to continue the recent trend of spectacular Super Bowls.  I heard Mike Greenberg say on the radio that Manning lives to win this game and you don’t often see quarterbacks like him lose in this game.  I really don’t know what he’s talking about, but it sounded cool enough for me to pick the Saints.  I look forward to seeing Peyton vs. the blitz again this week and seeing how many times Gregg Williams can draw something up to put Manning on his back.  I also think Brees, who has not been his defense-sculpting self lately, will bounce back and take MVP honors. Book it! No, don’t….but enjoy the game. 

March Sadness?  The rumors were flying this week that the NCAA was seriously considering–maybe even decided already–to expand the NCAA basketball tournament to 96 teams.  As Drew Magary of KSK/Deadspin said, “You know what this tourney needs? Every NIT team!”  Could you imagine this? After the play-in game, there are a total of zero games I am disinterested in watching, but if it went to 96 I just couldn’t get real riled up about Air Force and Oregon State playing for the right to go against Georgetown.  Madness!  Does anyone outside of the mediocre Big East teams like this?  I mean, even if you’re a mid-major you’d prefer some actual respect in the current system than this.  Please fix football’s postseason before you try your level best to ruin basketball’s. 

Who scored 52 points?!!  I looked at the TV last weekend and saw the following on ESPN’s bottom line: “POR Miller: 52 pts.”  Then I did one of those double takes where you go back to what you’re doing only to realize seconds later that something is horribly wrong.  “Does someone named Miller other than Andre Miller play for the Blazers?”  Was it Mike Miller? Reggie? Oliver?!! All seemed like better options despite knowing the truth.  Andre had scored 52 in his previous five games combined and even that included a 28 point outting that was 15 points over his season average.  Honestly, it’s one of the most impressive games I’ve heard of in a while.  Only one three, only seven free throws.  The guy made 21 two point shots.  Tip of the cap to you, sir. 

Hockey talk.  Trades are going down in the NHL prior to the Olympic break.  Some big names that most of you have never heard of changed teams this past week.  Most of the dealing involved the Eastern Conference though, so no worries for the Blackhawks.  The only meaningful impact on the Western Conference was that Calgary lost two of its best players in Olli Jokinen and Dion Phaneuf.  Sweet names.  Jokinen headed to the Rangers and Phaneuf to the Maple Leafs.  The Leafs also picked up goaltender Jean-Sebastian Giguere from Anaheim; not a bad week.  Finally, the big one: Ilya Kovalchuk was sent to New Jersey in exchange for a package of young players–including Patrice Cormier–and a first round pick next year.  Kovalchuk is the gem of the trading market and one of the best players in the league and if the Devils weren’t already among the favorites (currently 2nd in the Eastern Conference) they certainly are now.  If you learned or cared about nothing else in this paragraph, know that hockey players generally have awesome names.

OCNN Covers the Super Bowl.  Chad OchoCinco has been all over the place since his Bengals exited the playoffs.  Most recently he has launched his news team, OCNN, which has been covering the events in Miami from the Pro Bowl to Super Bowl Media Day.  This came after Ocho took a bus full of fans on a trip down to Miami that made stops along the way to do some charity work. Here’s some work from Chad and his “news team” below:

It’s Colts-Saints in the Super Bowl.  There have been great games lately, but few that have looked as good going in as Colts vs. Saints after both teams remained undefeated late into the season.  Both stellar QBs would experience huge boosts in their reputations with a win.  The Colts took care of the Jets after Peyton adjusted to the blitz and the Saints took advantage of another hilariously timed Favre interception to out coin flip the Vikes in OT.  So as we sit back and contemplate the nothingness of the Pro Bowl, keep in mind that this is the first time since #1 seeds have met in the Super Bowl since 1993. 

Kentucky is #1, for a bit.  Led by freshman John Wall, the Wildcats made it to the top spot for the first time since 2003. They were so excited that they made shirts!  As if that jinx wasn’t enough, President Obama even gave them a call to praise their fundraising efforts for Haiti and tell them to stay focused; he might as well have conferenced Oprah in on the call to top it off!  Naturally, the Wildcats lost their first game at #1, just like they did in 2003.  South Carolina was the team to take them down this time and they were fined $25,000 for storming the court.  They would offer to donate it to Haiti, but they don’t want the call from Obama.

Prank fail!  A couple of years ago a prankster set up his friend by tricking him into thinking he had made a shot blindfolded from half-court at halftime of a Maryland basketball game with help from the entire crowd.  So some high school students thought it would be a good idea to trick a coach the same way, promising him NCAA Tourney tickets if he made the half-court blind heave.  The blindfold was on, the crowd was ready to cheer, but the coach messed it up by nailing the shot.  Check the video.  Also, check out this teaser for the news the next night.  Tyrus Thomas could hit jumpers in this gym!

Greg Oden FTW. So some pics of Greg Oden’s anatomy reached the interwebs this week and caused quite the ruckus.  Oden saw it fit to apologize for the pictures, which were “for a lady friend” he was with at the time.  Then Greg made me spray water out my nose when he uttered “I’ve grown a lot since then.”  Perfect.

Arenas and Crittenton suspended.  A little less than a month after the stories started flowing in about the locker room antics in DC, David Stern announced Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton would miss the remainder of the NBA season.  I haven’t heard anyone say they thought the suspensions were too strict, and if you have you should punch their face. In case there was any doubt before this incident, the NBA definitely has a gun problem and if Stern erred at all it was in being too lenient.  It will be interesting to see what the league does to battle the issue going forward, but obviously the meetings, warnings, and current rules didn’t do the trick to prevent two players from bringing firearms to work. 

Enjoy your weekend!

Athletes help Haiti.  By far the most important story out there for the past week-plus is the tragedy in Haiti.  It feels right that athletes are doing their part and even inspired Jay Mariotti to write a decent piece.  Crazy, right?  I know I’m missing a ton, but Samuel Dalembert has been amazing with his contributions, along with other NBA stars current and past like D-Wade and Alonzo Mourning.  Hendrick Motor Sports sent planes to help bring people and supplies to the region.  Planes!  Roger Federer, David Ortiz, John Calipari (!)…the list goes on and on. 

Jets Jets Jets.  The New York Jets are in the AFC Championship Game.  Rex Ryan’s boys beat the Chargers in the only decent game of the weekend and move on to play the Colts this week, a game Ryan would be absolutely “shocked” to lose.  Really?  You can’t say the guy is shy or lacks value as entertainment.  He also sent Marty Shottenheimer the game ball from the win over the Chargers, who fired Marty after a great regular season ended in a playoff disappointment.  Ha!

Billups is always right.  Chauncey Billups spoke up this week about the ridiculous charade that is NBA all-star voting.  When he gave the statement, Allen Iverson and Tracy McGrady were both slated to be starters based on fan voting.  It looks like Steve Nash will actually pass T-Mac, but it’s still worth listening to the Wise One some more:  ‘I would rather it be something like the players vote (for the starters). Everybody knows who should be there or who is playing good enough as far as your peers go. … The fans probably should affect something. But I think that’s a bit too much.’” I e-gree. 

Goooooooaaaalllll.  Check out this amazing hockey goal!

No more streaking.  Two large streaks came to an end in one night this week, and I’m not talking about Stormin’ Norman’s laundry.  Hey-o!  Wednesday night Memphis needed a win over UTEP to set the NCAA record for consecutive conference wins with 65.  Didn’t happen.  The…Miners?…UTEPers pulled the upset and ended a streak that was mostly blowouts in devastating fashion.  Winning 64 straight in conference is impressive regardless of competition, but the Tigers have to be at least a little embarrassed.  On the same night DePaul ended its 24 game losing streak in the Big East by taking down Marquette.  Wooooooo!  Check out the heroics.

Lane Kiffin leaves Tennessee for USC, public eats him.  Wow, I hate Lane Kiffin but things really got kicked up a notch when he left UT for the left coast and USC.  Students put on a “riot” that an average Michigan State student would have slept through, the media wrote some scathing pieces, and they drew dongs on rocks!  Still more perplexing than all of that was the choice by Southern Cal to stick it to the NCAA and hire Kiffin.  The NCAA already denied the Trojans request to self-impose sanctions (a bad sign for USC) and they hire a guy who committed a handful of violations in a very public manner during his first year as a college head coach.  Predictable?  No.  But, perfect match?  Well, no.

David Backes is an American hero.  In case you don’t know who that is, Backes is a forward for the St. Louis Blues and was recently selected to represent the U.S. in Vancouver on the olympic hockey team.  The Canadians are the team to beat in the tournament and the US of A will be fortunate to medal, so Backes is taking to intimidation to level the ice.  In the first five games since the team was announced, Backes has been in five games and gotten in three fights… all against Canadian olympians.  First he gave Chicago’s own Jonathan Toews a beating, then took on Corey Perry of the Ducks, and finally Rick Nash of the Columbus Blue Jackets.  Keep it going David!

He was who we thought he was! Mark McGwire admitted to steroid use during his career and in particular in his record-breaking season where he hugged the Maris family a lot.  By now if you suspect someone of steroids use, just assume they did it.  An interesting issue in all of this is Tony LaRussa’s role.  As a professional coach do you have the obligation to look into something if you suspect foul play?  I guess it’s plausible he didn’t notice, what with the passing out in cars and such.

Agent Zero charged with felony gun possession.  More like felony FUN possession, amirite?  No, not really.  This was idiotic from the beginning.  NBA players and their affinity for guns did some warping of my mind apparently.  I just thought to myself, “they should really be counselling pro athletes on how not to be batshit crazy when handling their guns,” instead of “what’s with all these athletes owning so many guns?!”  Anyway, Gilbert could be facing some serious time–like Plaxico time– all over a prank.  Might want to rethink that C-4 prank you were going to play on me Stormin’ Norman.

Barkley was on SNL.  While being generally robotic and goofy-looking, I thought Charles was pretty funny.  Here’s a good skit.