Lane Kiffin Wants YOU Chicago!
Lane Kiffin has taken the SEC by storm since taking over as head coach of Tennessee. Not on the field exactly, losing to Florida and starting 1-2, but off the field Kiffin is firing shots at all takers. He accused Urban Meyer of violating NCAA rules in front of a bunch of people, violating rules himself; he told a recruit to fax his papers on signing day from somewhere other than his high school, implying that the high school was so inept they would screw it up (he’s not allowed back); and he told a recruit considering South Carolina that he would end up pumping gas if he chose the Gamecocks.
The hits keep coming nearly every time the guy gets in front of a microphone, he’s like an organized Kanye West, with a worse head coaching record. Well, your worst fears have come true Chicago fans, Kiffin is coming for you and you don’t have a chance at bedding his hot wife.
Kiffin on Bears quarterback Jay Cutler: “Cutler? Yeah, I tried to get him to sign with the Vols when he left Denver, but apparently the SEC frowns upon that kind of thing. What a mistake that would have been, guy’s a real piece of work. Did you know that prick got some kind of disease because he went to Vanderbilt?” When asked about Cutler’s success so early in his career Kiffin responded “I had twice as good of an NFL career.” Kiffin never played in the NFL.
On the Chicago White Sox: “Their manager–you know, that black guy–is awful. Their GM sucks too. I didn’t want to go public with this, but there were some major recruiting violations when they got that Peavy guy.”
Blackhawks: “Come on, hockey? So gay. I know I’ll have to apologize for that later, but seriously.”
Chicago Cubs: “Embarrassing team. I thought Al Davis and the Raiders had it bad. I’d love to bring my Vols to Wrigley and sing Rocky Top all night long after we beat them. Yeah, in baseball. Ryan Theriot told me once I looked a lot like Seth Rogen, but not so much after he lost weight, and I’m going to kick his ass for that. Kiffin, out!”